Archive for April, 2008

Lucid Dreaming: Entering Darkness

April 29, 2008

I’ve Noticed Shadows

I’m not familiar with the literature of lucid dreams, so I don’t know where this confession fits into it. I’m good at dreaming lucidly. But, like being awake, it is what it is and there is nothing I’m so interested in manifesting or changing.

However, I’ve noticed in dreams places of long and deep shadows. I’ve been meaning to walk into those dark places during a lucid dream. The other night I finally explored one of those deep, dark shadow places.

The Dream

I was in a garage — going somewhere, doing something — and I had just turned a corner. I looked behind me and saw not far away a long, deep, and very dark shadow area. Since I was lucid in the dream I thought what the heck and walked back into the shadow.

It was nothing more than a dark space in which I could not see! I walked back into the light in order to continue the dream.

The Nature of the Dark Place

However, the dark place was very peaceful too. It was the experience of awareness alone. Some people experience all their dreams from that place. It may be black as night, or have a cast of dark blue. It is the experience of awareness itself.

It seems that all dreams are edged by darkness. If you’ve never seen that darkness, I’m sure you sense it. That darkness marks the limit of the dream, the place where the play of inner light ends. So by all means, if you wish go beyond the world of the dream, look for the deep shadow area and enter it. This is not the Jungian shadow world. It has nothing to do with repression. It’s different, as explained below.

The End of the Dream Is Everywhere

What is the parallel in the waking world? What is the dark, deep, shadowy area of the world in which you are right now? How do you move beyond the everyday and into awareness itself?

That’s done by being aware that you are aware. That can also be done during a lucid dream, of course, at any point in any dream. That deep, dark shadow is everywhere. The end of the dream is everywhere, though it may be perceived as distant in some way.

The distance may be perceived as psychological, as something yet to be achieved. It may be felt as geographical, as being represented by a teacher who lives away from you. It may be physical in dream space, as the place of darkness I walked toward.

Clearly, distance isn’t real. If there is only awareness, there is no separation from it. There appears to be movement toward or away from awareness, but there isn’t any movement, just as in a dream nothing moves or fundamentally changes.

Do You Value the Dream or the Source of the Dream?

What’s important is what you value. If you value the dream and all the events occurring in them, then have fun. At least I am sure you will pay some attention to your pure existence or awareness. If you value awareness, then you will also be active in the dream world, but you will always know the dark, potent, wordless ground of reality.

This Darkness is Dark Because It Has Burned the Eyes That Would See The Light

Perhaps you are asking why darkness is used for the depiction of awareness and not light. This darkness is prior to the light. It is not the shadow side of Jungian psychology. It is not a shadow that hides repressed things.

The light of the dream comes out of this kind of darkness that I’m talking about. That’s how bright this darkness is. It is beyond seeing or knowing. There are no more eyes to be burned by this brightness. So it appears to be dark.

How To Discover That The Light Comes Out of The Darkness

If you doubt it, just enter that dark space in the lucid dream and then manifest a dream situation. You will see light form in the darkness and take whatever shape you want. Then you will get all caught up in the manufactured shapes. But if you remain lucid, you will see those shapes for what they are: absolutely nothing. But don’t let that keep you from enjoying that hot fudge sundae!

Eckhart Tolle: The Tip of the “New Spirituality” Iceberg

April 28, 2008

Those who have been into the new spirituality, also known as non-duality or nondual spirituality, for the last several years, recognize Eckhart Tolle as only one of the very good communicators within that spiritual niche.

His communication or expression of nondual spirituality (or nondualism) is neither greater nor lesser than many other men and women. It’s different. All the versions of the teaching of nonduality are different.

I would like to suggest that there are ways to supplement the works of Tolle. There are other voices, other ways of saying what Tolle is saying.

I want to recommend one author today. Chuck Hillig. Chuck wrote a classic book that has been praised by Deepak Chopra, Dan Millman (The Way of the Peaceful Warrior), The Los Angeles Times, and numerous others. That book is Enlightenment for Beginners. Chuck has written three other books that will take you further in your understanding of your true nature and the reality of the world.

To find out more about Chuck’s books, please visit this page.

If you have the time, also investigate the sponsors’ links in the column on the left hand side of this page. There are many excellent offerings and good people within the “new spirituality” of nonduality. Please leave comments or write me privately if you have any questions.

Awareness and Tranquility, by William Samuel

April 25, 2008

This is a review of A Guide to Awareness and Tranquility, by William Samuel

Biography: A Baker from Alabama

William Samuel never received the attention he deserved because he wasn’t part of the Zeitgeist of the 60s and 70s. Unlike his contemporary, the popular Alan Watts, Samuel was not involved in psychedelics, Zen, the Human Potential Movement, San Francisco spiritual subculture. Nor was Samuel associated with TM, the music of the times, Woodstock, or war protests. Bill Samuel live in Alabama, for gosh sakes, where he owned a bakery. He spoke simply and in an old-fashioned manner about awareness or God, basically.

Yet Samuel spoke a very modern nondual message. In fact, let’s face it, he was, and probably still is, ahead of his times.

A Teacher of Teachers:

It’s not to say William Samuel never had a following, even though he didn’t encourage it: “Most tenacious among those beliefs is the insanity that one must be either a leader or a follower. Allness leads what? Singleness follows whom?” He was considered a teacher’s teacher. With a genius IQ and a gift for communication, “he would get the most earnest and dedicated students of Truth. Quite a number of Taoists and Buddhists had found William’s message and came to study–even some who were called Masters.” Samuel saw fierce action in World War II, studied with a Taoist monk, traveled around the world seeking spiritual truth, was the first American to sit with a sage in India who would become world famous. (The information and quotations in this paragraph are from a short biography of Samuel at williamsamuel.com.)

Like Walking on Beach Stones:

This book is collection of brief letters, conversations, lectures, writings. They are organized into chapters, yet each short selection stands alone as a confession of awareness, as awareness, from the Identity of peace and tranquility.

Every book has its own texture and this one is like walking on a beach carpeted with smooth but hard and not comfortable beach stones. It’s not easy to walk on such a beach. At the same time there’s a pleasure in stepping onto each stone, compressing it into the stones and sand beneath and finding that you stand on a place of interest and substance.

Each writing is like that: compact, hard, and substantial. It’s not an easy, flowing stroll over the stones. But each writing is also sure and satisfying in its wholeness and firmness.

Besides confessions or claims that there is only awareness, Samuel addresses many practical issues. He brings the practical and the confessional together.

Confessions of Awareness and Tranquility:

First let’s look at the confessions, claims, reports, descriptions of awareness and tranquility.

“Awareness is who we are! Awareness itself! We are not the ego, the personality or body, who says Awareness is ‘mine.’ THAT is the incorrect identity, the ‘old man,’ the ‘liar from the beginning,’ the ‘deceiver,’ the devil himself. THAT is the one to be ‘put off.’ That is the one to ‘come out from … and be ye separate.’”

“Tranquility is ever present as our very Identity. It is always ‘here,’ but we cannot be very well aware of it while battling the external picture, and we cannot be aware of it at all while believing that Identity is dependent upon, and dictated to, by a world of ‘things.’”

“Many have come here thinking the discovery of Identity is to be an ‘illumination.’ Oh, how many times we have talked about that! Well, it is an illumination, but it has nothing to do with wild or unearthly emotions. It has to do with a joy quite beyond sensation.”

Practical Advice:

Samuel covers many worldly topics, including the ones illustrated below: charity, materialism vs spirituality, and racism.

Question: What are my obligations to other people? That is, as Awareness, what are my obligations to images and objects of perception?

Answer: From this standpoint, we have no obligations to other people. We simple do all that seems to be the sensible, honest thing to do. We do this while aware that the Identity ‘they’ are is That which is being this Self-same Awareness. What ‘they’ call miracles appear everywhere for everyone to see.

“In order to see Truth as Truth is, it is only necessary to be the Truth one already is – and cease from the false identification, from the one who uses, manipulates and ‘possesses’ Truth. … ‘But how do I do this?’ … We do this by simply being motiveless Awareness only – which, among other things, is to perceive without opinions (judgments), without saying ‘this is good’ and ‘that is evil,’ ‘I like’ and ‘I don’t like.’ Inevitably, the first step is to end judgment, then to perceive that our real Identity is Awareness itself, not the ego-container. It is as simple as this. Words cannot tell of the wonders that become apparent when this effortlessness is put into practice.”

“The proof is not things! Never! If it were, the United States would be overflowing with saints. Doctors would treat only the poor. The judgment that the presence of ‘things’ is ‘proof’ of one’s understanding is only the other end of the same dualistic nothingness that claims a lack of health, wealth or harmony is real! Do not be trapped into believing that the presence (or absence) of ‘things’ is either proof or disproof of Suffiency, Tranquility, Being.”

It was Alabama in the Sixties. Samuel wrote the following in this book: “About the judgment and classification of people: about color, nationality and religion. Ultimately everything boils down to the fact that Reality is all and that personality, racial identification, body-ego and the like are nothing.” Two full pages of writing follow that opening statement. Who is ready to hear that now, let alone forty years ago in the South?

Samuel covers other topics: attending church, grief, depression, business, money, death, love.

Refers to the Teachings of Christ:

Though this book is not a work of nondual Christianity, Samuel does show how his teaching of awareness and tranquility is supported by Christ’s teaching:

In a discussion on the limitations of positive thinking, Samuel writes, “’Who by taking thought can add one inch to his stature?’ Jesus asked. ‘Take no thought…’ said He. We have done with all personal thinking, positive and negative alike!”

“We need only insist on being tranquility to feel tranquility! ‘Ask and it shall be answered. … behold, I come quickly,’ says the Comforter. Reader, try for yourself and discover that this is so.”

You will encounter Christ not infrequently during your walk along this stony beach.

Dear Abby:

William Samuel plays Dear Abby in answering people’s letters about life problems. To a wife who is distressed that her husband does not share her interest in Truth, Samuel reminds her that “We are in the beholding business, and not in the business of judging how certain images are supposed to act or respond. To free them of such obligations is to find ourselves free of any dependence upon them for our happiness.”

Humor:

“Those who mistakenly identify themselves as the old man – that silly spectre – inevitably spoof themselves into playing the role of the Spook Inspector. In addition, they find themselves being the spurious spectator of other Spook Inspectors; Spook-self, self-spooked, or, Spectre-self completely spoofed. Of course, all of this is a fantastic fantasy of farcical foolishness, false, from the first, and powerless – but funny, after it is seen for what it is.”

“If we are to discover the Tranquility that is already our here-and-now-Identity, we simply must – and effortlessly can – stop attempting to play the part of that stumbling, fumbling, bumbling, trembling, untranquil, phobia-filled phantom called the ‘old man,’ the judge.”

I hope you now have a sense of the beach full of smooth rocks which this book is. Perhaps the tide will come in and wash you away.

A Guide to Awareness and Tranquility, by William Samuel

William Samuel

Excerpts, ordering info, other books by the author.

Reincarnation and Nonduality

April 24, 2008

Are you wondering about reincarnation and its place in the teaching of nonduality?

The teaching of Advaita Vedanta — also known simply as Advaita — is part of Hindu tradition. Advaita addresses your questions of karma and reincarnation. Dvaita means duality, and the ‘A’ prefix confers the ‘non’ portion. Advaita = Nonduality.

Advaita means nonduality, and nonduality means ‘not two.’ While things, events, phenomena appear to be separate, in reality there are not two — not separate — things.

Advaita is a tradition which takes the student through steps of knowledge leading to the full recognition of reality as nondual. Neither Advaita nor Buddhism nor other teachings in their advanced forms talk about reincarnation or soul development. Those experiences are not more special than other experiences. However, if questions about reincarnation are important to you, they need to be addressed.

In Advaita, one of the steps on the way to nondual understanding is the teaching of karma, free will, and reincarnation. This step is not the ultimate teaching of Advaita. The ultimate teaching is that there is only reality, God, Christ, Truth, The Eternal Self, The Kingdom of God, Oneness, or whatever you wish to call it.

It’s important to have a sense of the ultimate teaching while investigating your urgent questions, such as reincarnation.

One way of keeping the ultimate teaching present, is to resort to a metaphor.

View burning questions and intense emotions as the rising of waves in the ocean. Any wave can be tremendously awesome, hugely violent, or small and calmly gentle. Yet no wave is separate from the great, vast ocean. The ocean is the nondual self, the eternal Self, the real you. While Advaita teaches about the qualities of waves, the ultimate teaching is about the ocean itself.

I suggest that Advaita is the best context in which to pursue questions about reincarnation for one who senses nondual reality. If you wish to look into Advaita, begin at this page on Dennis Waite’s site. Also, Dennis’s books are the best guides to Advaita. In Back To The Truth he speaks specifically about reincarnation.

Chuck Hillig’s classic, Enlightenment for Beginners, brings reincarnation into the view of nondual reality. Chuck is a devotee of Ramana Maharshi, who is mentioned below.

Finally, note that the very same teacher of Advaita (or nonduality) will one moment explain reincarnation in detail and at the next moment deny there is such a thing as reincarnation.

Do not let the apparent contradiction confuse you. Do not be offended or insulted by any response. The teacher is speaking to different needs of different people. He is giving the answer that would best serve the specific student. Simply hone in on the response that is right for you and don’t worry about the rest, for now.

For example, look at this teaching from one of the great sages of Advaita, Ramana Maharshi.

Advaita requires that one know the source of questions about reincarnation. Until one is ready to approach that knowledge, and in order to stimulate curiosity about that knowledge, careful answers about reincarnation are given. So are answers given to questions about karma, free will, desire, creation, purpose, happiness, and the world in general.

Advaita is a full path to full knowledge of the Self.

Neo-Advaita? Well, that’s another story. Neo-Advaita is the confession, claim, report, or description of existence and reality from the point of view of one who has attained full knowledge of the Self. Some people are in such a disposition that they can hear one of these confessions and awaken to the full knowledge of Self. But many cannot. For those who cannot, the path of Advaita is available.

Attending to attention

April 23, 2008

When you’re writing, thinking, trying to state the way things are, try stopping for a second and turning to the fact that you are paying attention to what you are doing.

For a moment focus on the attention itself.

You may or may not find that an interesting step to take.

Leave a comment and let me know whether turning toward attention has done anything for you.

Valuing Awareness

April 20, 2008

My attentional thrust as a kid was such that awareness was valued over all. In many ways I was lost in it. I used to be able to look at a very small thing, such as a pebble on the ground or that was part of an earthen wall, and the pebble seemed very important, like more of a friend than any friend, more of a parent than any parent.

I had rapport with small things. I would pick up bees and play with them. The big world of careers, human entanglements, and all the associated comings and goings, didn’t interest me too much.

As I entered my thirties or forties, I could no longer look at a pebble and recognize awareness. Everything had become that recognized awareness.

There’s a big difference between seeing awareness in a pebble and seeing nothing but awareness wherever you look. The limitation of this relationship is that … it’s a relationship. It is a higher form of duality, a lower form of nonduality.

There’s an even bigger difference between recognizing nothing but awareness and awareness itself. The death of the seer of awareness means what? Awareness. That and nothing else. Now there is no pebble and nowhere to look. You can’t pick up little bees anymore. Why? Even if a photograph is taken of you picking up a bee, now it is not done by you.

There is no difference between your fingers and a stone on the ground in the Himalayas, in the sense that they are contents made of the same stuff and exist only in what appears to be a container known as the universe. The contents and the container are very flimsy. The atmosphere in which they flicker momentarily and beautifully, like northern lights, is awareness.

How is this little telling about awareness made practical? It comes down to valuing awareness. Very simple. Value awareness, your being, you being-ness.

I confess this as a valuer of awareness and a witness to what that valuing sets in motion from an attentional point of view.

As far as how you value awareness, you have to be able to intuit that already. Just sit, be still, and realize you are aware, you exist. Respect and value it. Do that as often and as deeply as you can.

Books and teachers? They can serve as guides. However, trust yourself first and last, and somewhere in between let the books and teachers fall.

And if you try to pick up a bee, you may get stung, if it is not meant for you to do naturally.

A Great Self-Realization Song

April 17, 2008

“But now old friends are acting strange. They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed.”

Both Sides, Now
by Joni Mitchell

Rows and flows of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
I’ve looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now

From up and down, and still somehow
It’s cloud illusions I recall
I really don’t know clouds at all

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As ev’ry fairy tale comes real
I’ve looked at love that way

But now it’s just another show
You leave ‘em laughing when you go
And if you care, don’t let them know
Don’t give yourself away

I’ve looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It’s love’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say “I love you” right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I’ve looked at life that way

But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed
Well something’s lost, but something’s gained
In living every day

I’ve looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know life at all

Getting Nonduality from American Idol

April 15, 2008

I’ve been watching American Idol and discovered a spark of brightness in Kristy Lee Cook. Kristy Lee made it to the top ten finalists, but the consensus was that she “had to” be eliminated. She wasn’t good enough. Most people didn’t like her.

I wrote on discussion boards that Kristy Lee could win the competition.

People vehemently opposed my position. “It’s impossible.” “She’s lucky if she lasts another week.” “She doesn’t belong there with the others.” “You’re delusional.”

Now Kristy Lee is in the top seven and guess what the consensus is? “Well, she might make the top four.” “The others aren’t doing so well anymore, so she might stick around.” “She sang a couple good songs and she’s pretty, so people are voting for her.”

Point is, Kristy Lee Cook showed sparks of brilliance, and then lifted and expanded those sparks. She dresses better, carries herself with greater confidence, sings with more emotion, connects with the audience. She has evolved from a contestant many felt forced to watch to a contestant very many look forward to watching.

How does this bear on understanding nonduality? Nonduality means no thing is separate from reality. Yet no two things are the same. When a person, a thing, is beheld, reality is beheld. The beholding is reality. The beholding is the recognition of perfection.

“Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Matthew 5:48

None of us — nothing — is separate from perfection or the Father, if you don’t mind the Christian reference. If you are Islamic, then Allah. Native American? Then the Great Mystery. Doesn’t matter what you call it.

Perfection is our condition. That doesn’t mean you don’t work hard. It means you are more free to work hard. It means you acknowledge your already-perfect condition through your actions.

This isn’t positive thinking. It isn’t thinking at all. It is seeing. Perhaps it is faith. It is recognition of perfection and allowing action out of that. What is the action? It is the identification and raising of the sparks of brilliance.

The task of individual men and women is to extract those sparks that are his or her fortune to encounter in life, and to raise and spiritualize them. … The Hasidic doctrine of Tikkun holds that a person’s soul exists in sympathy with the people and objects in his environment, in such a manner that each moment in a person’s life presents an opportunity to “raise the sparks” that only he or she can redeem. The Lurianic Kabbalah

I saw that Kristy Lee knew the perfection of her own self, recognized the sparks to be raised, and that she was on the verge of waking up to that recognition. And she did. She is. That’s all there was to my prediction.

In your everyday life I invite you to recognize this perfection. At least have faith in it. Don’t write anyone off. Don’t be disappointed by your kids or frustrated by your parents. Don’t let go of that friend or mate. See the perfection, the sparks of brilliance in them, that they may come to see it. Of course, recognize the sparks in yourself.

Yes, there is a time to fully dis-engage from one person or another. No, I’m not saying that in the name of perfection terrorists should be allowed to roam freely.

Be more attentive to those in your social circle. Recognize perfection. See the sparks in a person that might rise toward perfection.

Kristy Lee may get voted off the show this week if she slips up. The raising of sparks is not like lines that go straight up. They could stall. However, the observation is that she has awakened to her perfection. If she keeps raising those sparks in fairly straight lines over the next few weeks, she will win American Idol.

Watch Kristy sing.

Are you an impostor?

April 14, 2008

Richard Beymer is somewhat famous for acting in certain films, most notably West Side Story opposite Natalie Wood, and the role of Ben Horne on David Lynch’s TV series Twin Peaks. For the past number of years Mr. Beymer has been living and making experimental and documentary films in Iowa, the Lower East Side and India.

Richard’s new book is called Impostor. He writes…

Let me say at the outset that this is NOT a book written by an advaitic master, enlightened guru or self-proclaimed teacher, of which there are many, trying to jar “us sleepy ones” out of our somnambulistic stupor…it espouses no knowledge or technique nor does it give any advice on how to make your life any other way than it already is. It is simply a work of fiction that hopefully people who are interested in advaitic concepts along with Hollywood movies will enjoy in this topsy-turvy mad-cap search for, “Who am I when not being who I think I am?” which is what this book is about.

It’s an unauthorized autobiography of someone who is stumbling along the path, rummaging up and down the alleys of his mind, and others, searching for clues as to who he is (or isn’t), figuring everybody else gets “IT” but him. It’s about George, someone who is addicted to the bliss of ignorance, someone who has lived his whole life acting as if he were who he appeared to be-an impostor, an ego encapsulated bag of bones and flesh suspended between the belief of birth on the one end, and the fear of death on the other, and who, in limbo, betwixt and between, has managed to eke out this momentary existence, it having (as George finds out) at its core, no more reality than a dream.

EXCERPT

FADE UP: INTERIOR. HOLLYWOOD SOUNDSTAGE. A LARGE WHITE SPACE. CLOSE ON SPACEMAN GEORGE. He’s suited in his silver spacesuit looking as deranged as ever, a physical and mental wreck.

THE DIRECTOR: (screaming from off camera) “Roll ‘em!” Now for God sakes, try to get it right this time, George. Action!

The only object in the scene with Spaceman George is a full-length mirror on rollers. Spaceman George takes a deep breath and deftly, in the tradition of the great Hollywood musicals, leads his reflection throughout the space as a combination visual aid and dance partner as he rambles and rants his way through his self-obsessed monologue.

SPACEMAN GEORGE: All right, here’s my dilemma. See if you can relate. On the one hand (referring to his reflection), there’s not remembering who I am when being who I appear to be. On the other hand (referring to himself), there’s who I appear to be when being who I think I am. That is, this me, here . . . the one in question.

Spaceman George spins the mirror around and cozies up to his reflection. He continues:

SPACEMAN GEORGE: Let me be more precise. I’ve forgotten who I am when not being who I think I am. That’s it in a nutshell, the one-liner. That’s what this whole film is about, so be warned.

Now I don’t know about you but I assumed I’d live forever, that somehow or other I’d get out of this life alive, that I’d figure it out, slip by unnoticed-maybe through some tear in the cosmic fiber-and I would just step out into eternal life, God-like, you know, in my white tie, top hat and tails . . . maybe doing a little soft shoe routine in my shiny black patent leather shoes . . . kind of free and easy like Fred Astaire in one of those 1930′s MGM musicals, like Flying Down to Rio with Ginger Rogers . . . you know, boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back again-ta da,- happy ending. But that was another film. Instead, I was destined to relive the end of West Side Story, where I died tragically, too soon, having almost-but not quite-figured it out, about remembering who I am when not being who I appear to be.

I was so close I could taste it. The clues were everywhere. It was only left for me to reconstruct the puzzle, connect the dots . . . but NO . . . I had to die. What a shocker to wake up dead. I mean you have no idea. It’s like nothing else ever. All I knew was, this life, this precious moment of eternity was over too soon . . . far, far too soon. There were all those things I never did, never said, the wasted moments, the years. I was just beginning to get the hang of it, the feel of it, the shame of it, the blame of it, the rage, the guilt part . . . the “I’m sorry, Marie, forgive me, I messed up” part . . . the part where you and me and everything is perfect just the way it is, with no deletions, additions, corrections, expectations, or otherwise tampered-with parts . . . the unconditional love part . . . the part where I don’t demand in you what’s lacking in myself part. The part where I accept who you are when not who you appear to be, rather than trying to change you into who you aren’t, so I can forget who I am when not being who I appear to be in your eyes.

Well, it’s all over now, baby blues. I jigged when I should have jagged, zigged when I should have zagged. I hesitated. And as you reminded me time and time again, “He who hesitates is lost.” There was so much left unfinished, the whole last act . . . was he really insane or just play-acting? Did she really fool him into thinking she loved him or did he know all along she didn’t? Or was he just pretending he believed her to see if he could detect a lie in her performance? Or did she set the whole thing up and just let him believe it was his idea to prove she was who she appeared to be, when she was really someone else? Now I’d never know.

Picture it yourself . . . if you were to die, no warning, like right now, just keel over and die, not knowing who you are when not being who you appear to be-that is, this part you’re playing-and don’t kid yourself, you there . . . you are playing a part-what would be left? There would be nothing, that’s how I see it. Zilch. Nada. But, if you were to die being who you are when not being who you appear to be, then dying wouldn’t be death, as in annihilation, the total eradication of being, but rather, could conceivably be just a change of scene, like in the movies. In fact, from the die-ee’s point of view, nothing would be any different . . . Oh, maybe a little bump in the road, a little What the hell was that?, but no difference, not really. Right? I mean, you’d just be whoever you are when not being who you think you are- simple.

Now, to an outside observer in a fixed matrix, of course, you would appear dead, gone, outta here . . . but for the die-ee, the one in question, it would just be a blip on the radar screen . . . a simple dream shift . . . no biggie. But, and this is the heart of the matter . . . I’m lost in the play, consumed by my part, obsessed with my image. (In a sudden rage Spaceman George breaks the mirror.) I really believe the lie, that I am this “I,” that I am who I appear to be. I’ve forgotten something, something key, something vital to the whole outcome. I’m sure of it. And whatever it is (screaming in the camera) IT’S DRIVING ME CRAZY!

Impostor: Or Whatever Happened to Richard Beymer, by Richard Beymer

Read reviews and order the book.


Read another excerpt

Review of Impostor:

Impostor is a confession of the author’s true nature. The form of the confession is a screenplay that unfolds as do one’s thoughts or dreams. Using videos and films and a fun house full of characters, layers of thought and experience slip into other layers, drop, blend, recycle, always washed by a witnessing of it all.

The author’s true nature becomes known through a process of facing his nature as an impostor in life. Throughout this book, just as we get a feel that the main character has awakened to his true nature, we find that it is only another video, another false self, another impostor. There is a constant pushing forth into new layers of awareness without any real breaking through the mode of impostor until the very end.

By immersing oneself in the flow of this book, one may see how difficult it is to break out of impostor mode. At least we can be aware that we are in it! Then through a process of playing all the videos of our so-called life, and the videos within them, and videos within them, and the videos and films created to explain them, we can finally come to a true knowledge of what this existence is all about. Impostor is a wild, funny, tumultuous tour of an amusement park fun house. The amusement park is the world, the fun house is your life, and there is a way out.

Review written by Jerry Katz

The Nonduality Game and How To Situate Yourself Within It

April 13, 2008

The non-duality game is all about knowing, developing, and promoting your niche within nondual spirituality. What I want to talk about is situating yourself within the game. I’m going to use the board game analogy, where you have a plain board and glued on top of it a printed sheet containing spaces within which the mechanics of the game play out.

Nondual spirituality comes in two varieties. One kind is essentially silence. Since this kind of silence is neither empty nor full, there are no words to describe it. If it was empty or full, it could be described because those qualities are known to everyone. The silent kind is like the board of a board game prior to the gluing on of the wonderful world of the game.

The second variety of nondual spirituality, then, is the colorful world of the game. It’s very busy. A roll of the dice and men move from square to square, cards are picked, spinners are spun. This is the game of nonduality. This is where I am right now.

You cannot play the game unless you have a leg in both worlds: one leg in the silent, pure game board prior to the gluing on of the game, and another leg on the printed sheet that goes on top of the plain and untainted board.

That’s your starting position. The only thing that changes is the weight you put on each leg. There’s a time to be fully involved in the game and a time to withdraw.

The bottom line in the nonduality game is to find a unique place on the thin printed game sheet that is glued onto the clear, perfect, unstained board right beneath it, without ever fully leaving one or the other. If you become lost in one or the other, you’re out. Go sit on the couch and watch Oprah.